One Life Ch.14 My December

Chapter Fourteen:  My December

Sesshoumaru woke with a start.  The room he was in was dimly lit with the warm orange glow of the oil lamps that hung on the walls.  He was in his bed, in his own room.  

His own bed.  

Damn he was thirsty.

He moved to sit up and his head began to swim.  His body ached all over and his chest hurt.  He burned with pain from the inside out, and every movement, every breath he took sent a shock of sharp pain through him.   He slowly lay back down and looked down at his bandaged chest letting out a growl in frustration.  Memories, fleeting images, flashed through his mind’s eye.  He remembered to troll attack.  He remembered being run through and how he had been too weak from the poison to transform.  He remembered fighting with his last ounce of strength, fighting against the overwhelming agony and heaviness that had overcome him as he had been trying to get to Rin.

Rin…

“Jaken.”  He called, noticing how hoarse his voice was.  

The little imp scurried in almost instantly.

“Master!  You’re awake!  I’m so glad!  We began to worry after the first week…”

Sesshoumaru sat straight up ignoring the pain. His arm shot out and grabbed the startled toad demon by his neck.

“Do you mean to say that I have been lying here for a full week?”  Sesshoumaru demanded.

“Y..y..yes m’lord.  Eh…Longer.  It has been about 13 days now since Master Kazuo and his panther companions found us.  Though I was merely unconscious, you had a blade protruding from your chest and you were face down in the stream.  Master Kenta said you were badly poisoned and that you were so close to death that even your demon blood and healing abilities gave little hope without your Tensaiga to help the healing.

Sesshoumaru blinked at his vassal.  So my father’s sword has been taken.  Is that what the Trolls were after then?   

“And Rin?  How does she fare?  He asked, dropping the toad and leaning back down against his pile of pillows letting his tired eyes drift closed.

“Ah…M’lord…that is to say...the girl…uh…”  

Sesshoumaru opened his eyes turning his icy stare on the stammering imp.

“Well…?”  He asked in his usual dead tone, but he knew the answer.  Memories of his last sight of her being sliced open and slashed at as she was being dragged off assaulted his thoughts.

“M’lord.”  Jaken cleared his throat and shakily began his explanation.

“We found her bow in the river and we found pieces of silk from her sleeping robe, but M’lord, we also found blood.”  Jaken’s voice grew to a choked whisper, his eyes glassing over.

“Lots of blood.”

“She has been missing all these days now.  We sent out patrols in each direction from the campsite and even sent Ah-Un to search by sky.  We searched for days, but we found no other trace of her.”

“M’lord, she’s dead!”  At this last statement Jaken’s voice cracked and tears were streaming down his face.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes at Jaken’s words letting out a long breath.  His heart was seizing in a sharp pain.  It felt like some heavy and unmovable object was suddenly hammered to his chest.

“…dead.”

He heard the words echo in his mind.

The scent of cherry blossoms and the sound of the little song she used to sing filled his mind.

“Leave me.”  He softly commanded, and heard his faithful servant retreat from the room without a word, drawing the door closed.

“…dead.” The declaration echoed again.

He squeezed his eyes more tightly closed trying to block out the memory of her song.

Even if Tensaiga hadn’t been lost, thirteen days is too long.  Her soul will have left her body by now.   His rational mind reasoned as he tried to grasp for any idea of how to get her back safe,…alive.

But other memories filled his mind.  

Her scent and the way she looked at him, her hazel eyes always so trusting and full of love.  

Her beautiful smile and her feminine laugh.  

The sound of his name whispered passionately from her lips.  

The sound of terror that filled her voice as she screamed his name while they ripped her open. She had been screaming for him and he hadn’t been able to reach her.

He couldn’t hold it any longer.  He let out the roar that had been building since Jaken’s words had reached his ears.  He yielded to it and let it rip through him.  The walls seemed to shake with the heart-wrenchingly mournful sound that echoed through them.  When he could no longer push an ounce of breath from his lungs the sound faded and an empty silence was all that was left.  He was vaguely aware that his body was trembling and suddenly he couldn’t breath.  A helplessness washed over him that was so consuming that he thought he would go mad.  Her terrorized eyes plagued his thoughts.

She is gone.  She is gone and there is nothing I can do.  No way to ever take that look from her eyes.

The last memory he would have of his sweet, innocent Rin was of her fear and pain, but not for herself, rather for him.  Even in dying she had selflessly felt only for him.

Day turned to night, light into dusk, and the Lord of the West lay unmoving, remembering her face, her laugh, and her sweet, sweet scent.  The pain slowly faded to a dull ache, and after a while, there was nothing once more.  He was numb.  This numbness he knew so well.  It could be ignored so easily, and then there he could feel it.  His need for revenge.  

The troll demons will all die.

Night took hold of the world as the Demon Lord drifted off to a deep healing sleep thinking of the different ways he would torture each and every one of his foes, Rin’s cherry blossom scent and expressive hazel eyes permanently fixed just in the back of his thoughts.

Yes…they will all die.

*****
The seasons held no joy for the Western Lord any longer.  Where he used to be able to sit on the beach and watch the lightning of a late summer storm roll across the sea or sit beneath a tree and admire the fall leaves for hours, he no longer took any simple joy from Mother Nature.  As late summer turned to crisp autumn and later to the icy cold of winter, Lord Sesshoumaru healed slowly, the unique poisons assaulting his demon blood finally having run their course.  Lord Kazuo’s second in command had returned from the North in early fall with the approval of the Mating Ritual ceremonies to be postponed until the spring.  The panther demon lord stayed in the palace through the fall and into the harsh winter, and as spring drew near, the two stoic demon lords prepared to leave for the North.

Too soon the early spring day of their departure arrived and Lord Sesshoumaru found himself sitting just outside the closed door of Rin’s old rooms.  He had not entered the cozy room even once since Rin’s death, and yet he was drawn here time and time again.  

Her scent still lingers here.

Slowly he reached out and slid the screen open and sat looking inside.  The dried flowers that hung from every nook and the bright silks that covered the furniture seemed to sing a merry song while waiting for their equally cheerful mistress to come for them.  After her mating ceremony was completed she had planned to come back for the rest of her belongings.  His gaze swept over a canvas by the window and he paused to look at the unfinished work.  The deep blues and grays told of a rolling sea crashing upon a sandy white beach, lightning flashing across a cloudy sky.  She would not be back to finish it.

She will not be back this time.     

He reached out again and slid the screen closed.  He would have Jaken clear out the room…eventually.  

But not yet.

Her scent…still lingers here.

His heart gave a sharp jerk and squeezed painfully as a strange lump formed in his throat.  He needed air!  He needed to be away from all of the subtle reminders of her.  The flower vases around the castle, all empty, the mournful servants, her empty room, her possessions, her scent!

He gathered his power into him and materialized outside in the gardens.  He took a deep cleansing breath closing his eyes and trying to think of the alliance that was finally going to be completed after so many years.  The alliance that his father before him had believed in and supported.  It would be an excellent alliance that would bring peace and pride to a more powerful united land.  And of course there was the treaty with the central regions to be pleased with as well.  Lord Kazuo had agreed to the treaty even though he no longer had a bride to seal the treaty.  Even though he no longer had…

Rin.

He shook his head in frustration.  

Always!  My thoughts always return to her!  There is nothing more to be done!  She is gone!  She was a mere blink in my entire demon lifespan!   Sesshoumaru’s rational mind yelled at him to forget her once and for all and get on with more important matters.

But the scent of cherry blossoms floated across his sensitive nose and his eyes snapped open.

Rin!

He turned slowly, following the sweet scent and fixed his gaze upon the source.  The Sakura tree that bloomed so close to the bath house had erupted with the lovely white blooms in celebration of spring time.  Their fragrance hung thick in the air.  He remembered Rin plucking the blossoms fresh in the spring and summer to scrub her skin with.  He remembered discovering her drying the leaves and storing them in sachets and asking her about it.  She had told him that she wanted to have some during the winter because she knew he didn’t like her human scent.  He had merely raised an eyebrow at her and left her to her business at the time.  How he wished now that he had told her that he had found her scent pleasant.

He blinked the memory away and glared up at the tree.  It was suddenly taunting him.  In his mind’s eye he could see the happy branches waving at him in the breeze and swore he saw it smirking at him.  His vision bled to crimson and rage began to fill him.  It didn’t matter that he carried no weapon.  The snickering tree would die just the same.

With a single slash, a whip of pure poison energy sliced cleanly through the thick trunk and the tree toppled.  It wasn’t enough.  The blossoms still smelled so sweet, like his Rin.

He slashed again and split the fallen tree in half.  He slashed again.

An image of an awkward teenage Rin waving at him from the branches of this very tree flashed through his thoughts.

He slashed again.

A grown Rin sitting in Ah-Un’s field surrounded by the bright yellow flowers that she so loved, a soft breeze tossing her hair, her bright hazel eyes sparkling an almost emerald green in the sunlight as she gazed at him.

He slashed again, sucking in a breath and holding it and trying to fight the strange pain that would not release its grip on his chest.

Rin fondly caring for Ah-Un.

SLASH

Rin good-naturedly teasing a squawking Jaken.

SLASH

Rin efficiently running the household and conducting preparations for some important visitor.

SLASH

Rin in his arms as they floated above the clouds, her soft lips swollen with his kiss.

SLASH

Rin, warm and soft beneath him, her every response sending him further into passionate oblivion.

He slashed again, but this time hit only shreds and ground.  He stood motionless then, his crimson gaze fading with his rage.  His heart pounded in his chest and his breath came raggedly as he looked at what he had done.  Soft white petals seemed to fall from the heavens around him as they drifted to the ground to rest forever.  The offending cherry tree was gone.  Bits and pieces were scattered all around.  Dead.  Like his Rin.

But, the scent was stronger now.  Fresh and mixed with the scent of the fresh cut wood.  He stood there unmoving, staring at a single flower that floated down right across his face and settled on his shoulder.  Out of all of the flowers, out of all of the destruction, this single flower had survived whole and perfect.  It made him angry all over again.  The lump in his throat ached when he swallowed, and his chest burned as he drew in each breath.

This is ridiculous!  I have already given my grief for her!   His inner reason barked at him.

He reached up and brushed the single flower from his haori with a flick of his wrist.

There is no time for this nonsense.

Jaken’s odor caught his nose at that moment announcing his approach before the toad could say anything.  

“What is it, Jaken?”  Sesshoumaru asked in his usual emotionless tone as he willed himself to calm down.

“Master, excuse me, but Lord Kazuo is ready to depart.”  Jaken quietly explained as he surveyed the shredded tree.

Without saying a word, Lord Sesshoumaru turned and walked back towards the main house.  Jaken stood for a moment at the mess that used to be the beautiful Sakura tree.

The master sure chooses to vent his grief in strange ways. He thought to himself as he bent to pick up a single whole blossom.  The pink and white petals were still full and silky and the fragrance was still as fresh and sweet as if it were still hanging from its mother branch.  

It still has life in it yet, and the scent reminds me of Rin.   He mournfully thought to himself as he examined the blossom.  He decided to keep the flower for a while.  It brought him a small comfort.  The girl had, after all, been his closest friend, his fiercest rival, and his most trusted ally.  Yes, the stem was not long but it would float nicely in a small bowl of water.  Perhaps it would live for a few more days.

*****
The travel party was a lot larger than Lord Sesshoumaru was used to and their progress went much slower than he would have liked.  They still had to make a few detours before heading North and the delays fanned the flames of his already irritated mood.  He continued his march as his thoughts turned to the young panther demon lord.  He looked at the demon from the corner of his eyes as he walked.  He was indebted to Lord Kazuo for his life.  Strangely this didn’t bother him as much as he would have thought.  The panther had proven to be a reliable and trustworthy ally as well as a strange source of comfort.  He spoke very little, which suited Sesshoumaru just fine, and he asked for nothing.  He also proved to be quite useful when Sesshoumaru had been too ill to protect his territories form the lesser demons that heard whispers of his demise.  Lord Kazuo and his companions had stayed at the palace and had provided a powerful enough presence that any of those lesser demons thought better of challenging the Western Lord’s rule.  By all rights, Sesshoumaru knew he should not have survived the troll attack.  

The alliance with this honorable leader will be a great alliance indeed.

His thoughts strayed to the Lady Kasumi.  She had been in love with this honorable demon so many years ago and she had to give that love up for a peace treaty.  He wondered what it would have been like for her and Kazuo had Kazuo been the leader back then that he was now.  Suddenly Rin was in his thoughts again.  He was becoming used to her memory always readily jumping to the front of his thoughts.  Would she have been happy with Lord Kazuo?  

I love you.   The memory of her whispered declaration heightening the regret he felt so keenly every time he thought of her.

Would she have remembered that she loved him after she would have been marked?  Did the Lady Kasumi remember that she had loved Kazuo?  

It doesn’t matter.   He told himself.  The treaty has been in place for centuries and now it is time to complete it.

Four days of travel brought the party to the edges of a volcanic land covered in black ash.  Heat radiated off the ground and nothing grew.  Sesshoumaru maintained his composure, but wanted to wrinkle his nose and snort at the sharp scent of hot lava and ash.

Totosai’s forge.

“Jaken, we are going.”  He ordered as he headed into the rocky land, blocking out the harsh smell assaulting his senses and burning his eyes.  He did not look back as Lord Kazuo and his companions turned and continued North.

It took them the better part of the day to reach the forge.  It was a black cave in the side of the angry mountain.  Smoke billowed from the escape above the cave, and Sesshoumaru could here the steady clang of metal on metal as he approached.  As he came closer to the entrance the clanging stopped abruptly and Totosai’s cry of pain came sputtering out of the cave.  Sesshoumaru stopped and waited.  It would not be long.  The old fool was not as senile as he pretended to be.  He probably already knew he was there.

Sure enough, the forge master came scuttling out in a huff in a matter of seconds, clutching his blackening thumb and cursing.

“Oh no you don’t!  We agreed on a time and price and you didn’t show up you ungrateful pup!  After all I’ve put up with from you, you think you can just…”

“Shut up, Totosai, before I decide to cut your tongue from your rattling head.”  Sesshoumaru commanded icily.  Jaken came scurrying out from behind Sesshoumaru instantly.

“How dare you insult the master like that!  You old fool!  Lord Sesshoumaru will…*gahh!*”

Sesshoumaru stepped on the sputtering imp and continued towards Totosai.  “Do not forget, Totosai, that you are repaying me for letting you live after you failed to commission my sword.”

“Ummm….what was I saying again?”  The old man looked around blinking wide empty eyes around, and then settling on Sesshoumaru again.

“Sesshoumaru!  What a pleasant surprise!  What brings you to the forge once more?”  He gushed in his raspy voice.  Sesshoumaru was not fooled of course.  He kept his gaze steady on the old steel smith.

“Jaken.”  He commanded.

Jaken immediately got to his feet and scuttled over to Totosai.  “You will repair the Staff of Two Heads!”  Jaken proclaimed as though it were a great honor.

“What!”  The smith squawked back.  “You broke it!  How could you do that!  Even the human girl is more worthy of carrying the staff than you, you stupid…”

“Silence!”  Sesshoumaru cut him off with a short command.  “You will not speak of her again.”  He said with deadly calm as he watched the old man’s eyes light with understanding.  The great bug eyes popped out of his head as they first swept all around the area around Sesshoumaru searching and then back to the Demon Lord.  He swallowed audibly when he saw the ice in Lord Sesshoumaru’s eyes.

“Come in then.  I have the dagger you commissioned last spring, and I would like to get started on the Staff before it gets too dark.”  He turned and headed back into the darkness of the cave, Sesshoumaru following and Jaken standing guard.

The old man set to work immediately, moving about the forge proficiently as he went.  “I had heard rumors of an attack, but I had not heard of the severity.  I hoped that they were just rumors.”  The old man began chattering as he worked.

Sesshoumaru stood unmoving in the shadows watching the forge master work and listening to the old man rambling.  

“Troll demons always were trouble for the dog demon clan…”

“What?”  Sesshoumaru cut in shortly, his eyes boring into the smith.

“What?  What did I say?  I don’t remember.  Eh…where am I anyway?”  The old man blinked looking around, a suspiciously guilty look on his face.

In an instant Sesshoumaru had the forge master by the neck and dangling in the air.  “Do not play games with me, Totosai.  The trolls have taken two from me and I will have my revenge.  Now, tell me what you know of them before I decide you are of no use to me.”  Sesshoumaru hissed.

“Ack…alright….just don’t kill me!”  The old man wheezed.

Sesshoumaru dropped him and waited while Totosai gasped and choked on the ground.  The forge master glared up at the demon lord from the ground before sitting up and beginning his explanation.  

“We weren’t sure that it had been a troll attack, but the signs all pointed to them.”  He began.

“We?”  Sesshoumaru questioned.

“Eh…yes…myself, Bokusenou the Great Magnolia, Sya the Sheath, and Myoga the Flee.  We weren’t certain that the trolls were the attackers, so we didn’t say anything.”  Totosai continued.

“Troll demon blood is the only substance that appeared to poison the Dog Demon clan, and they were quite formidable in strength.  They had no power to speak of, but they could tear even the strongest steel in two with their bare hands.  They are motivated by greed, being material creatures by nature.  They covet treasure above everything else and are extremely lazy.”  

“Nothing had been taken from the palace the night your Lady mother was killed, so we were reluctant to start a war against the trolls knowing how effective their poison was against the dog demon clan.  There had been no reason for them to attack.  The swords were the only objects that might have been tempting enough to entice the trolls into attacking and they were with your father.  The attack was very specific to that room, so we believed that you were supposed to be the target, and not your lady mother.  The troll demons would have had nothing to gain by killing you, so we concluded that it had to have been someone or something else.”  Totosai paused as he stared into the fire.

Sesshoumaru felt what was left of his world crumbling.  He remembered the mounds of dirt and the scent of the poisonous blood both when his mother had been attacked and when Rin had been attacked.  Then he remembered something else.  

“No, the attackers were trolls.  The forest was sick then just like when they came for Rin.  They travel underground.  No one would have been able to fake that.”  Sesshoumaru countered.

Totosai’s eyes grew larger.  “Then they were assassins for hire.  Someone was paying them.  Someone promised them a treasure that they couldn’t resist.”  Totosai’s eyes narrowed as the pondered the possibilities.  

“Boy, they weren’t after your mother, they were after you.  Someone wanted you assassinated.”  Totosai reasoned in a matter-of-fact voice, sudden awe and realization evident in his voice.

Sesshoumaru felt ill to his stomach.  He swallowed and fought to maintain his cool composure.

“Then why would they attack Rin at the palace, and then again in the forest?  The attack in the forest makes no sense.  They attacked the same room as they did so many years ago.  They thought it to be my room then.  And again, so many years later, they still thought it to be my room.  But why, then, did they leave me alive in the forest.”  Sesshoumaru reasoned, his mind working to fit the pieces of the puzzle together.  

“Bring me the treasure.” Sesshoumaru suddenly remembered the huge troll demon lord’s orders as it attacked in the forest.

“They left me alive.  They wanted my swords and left me alive.  They are not working for anyone any longer.  They didn’t care whether I died or not.”  Sesshoumaru concluded.

“Think Boy!  If they attacked what they thought was your room again after so many years, then at that time, they were still working for someone.  They do not attack buildings by nature.  They had a purpose in attacking that room this time.”  Totosai countered.

“Rin was definitely the target of that attack.  They tried to enter the room through the window and only fled when I entered the room.  They weren’t after me this time.”  Sesshoumaru rationalized.

“Who would benefit from your death all those years ago, and now benefit from young Rin’s death?  What was so special about then that is the same now?”  Totosai asked utterly perplexed.

“The Marking Ceremonies.”  Sesshoumaru answered simply, but he was still confused.

What could Rin have to do with my Marking Ceremonies now?  She wasn’t even born when I gave Kasumi the Kiss during the first ceremony and the first attack occurred.

Late into the night and early the next morning, the two sat trying to unveil answers the mystery.  No more answers came except one.  Totosai knew where to find the Troll demon hoard and Sesshoumaru would finally have his revenge.